I was just innocently scrolling through Hulu when I came across a show called Sewer Divers. For fans of documentaries, it says. Which I am. But I didn’t realize I was also a fan of people who voluntarily dive into literal sewage for a living. Yet here we are.
This poor woman’s basement… y’all. Everything—and I mean everything—is floating. And I swear there’s corn. Which, let’s be honest, tells you everything you need to know about the situation. There’s a guy in waders poking at it like he’s on some noble quest, and I’m over here thinking, Sir. You deserve a medal. And several booster shots.
And then there’s another guy, fully suited up—under the actual streets. In a dry suit (you know, the kind that keeps you dry while you swim through other people’s nightmares), zipped up tighter than a NASA astronaut, just swimming through tunnels like that’s a normal Wednesday. Yikes doesn’t even cover it. You could pay me Jeff Bezos money and I’d still be asking if my tetanus, polio, and everything-in-between shots were up to date before even considering stepping foot down there.
It’s the kind of show that’s both bad and good in the same way that certain scented candles are “ocean breeze” and “low tide” at once. You can’t look away, but you kind of wish you could. It’s riveting, revolting, and—against all odds—comforting.
Because suddenly, my life doesn’t seem so chaotic. Sure, I have 4,000 unread emails, a hoarded-out office that could qualify for a mid-season intervention, and a dog that occasionally snacks on bathroom trash. But at least nothing in my basement is actively floating.
And look, as someone who’s immunocompromised (thank you, multiple sclerosis), this is definitely not the career path for me. But to the folks who do it—thank you. You’re the real heroes. You make it safe for the rest of us to walk around above ground, blissfully unaware of the chaos below our feet.
Because at the end of the day, maybe that’s what we’re all doing—trying to keep the system flowing, one blocked drain at a time.
Update: I just found out Sewer Divers is a series. A whole series. My husband is absolutely thrilled about this development. (Read: not thrilled. At all.)
Absurdities and Fires 